On shoes and ships and pyramid schemes
May. 10th, 2006 09:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
leftyjewSo Shoshana asks me if I wanted to help her roommate out. She was trying for a promotion with her part-time job and needed to get people to come to a financial presentation on "how money works in this country, investment, etc" to get it. "I gave her your phone number so she could contact you. Is that okay?" "Sure, I'll help someone get promoted, and I could stand to learn a thing or two about money."
So I go. (Oooh, I almost forgot to mention the best part - that we go to Vegetable Garden before. Mmmmm vegan Chinese.) I also invite my coworker and a friend of mine (they declined). I was told to dress in "business attire" which to me (nonprofit techie) means that I have to wear not jeans. Everyone was dressed in suit and tie. I was dressed in black slacks and a button-down shirt. My coworkers probably thought I was going for an interview. When I got there, I was (somewhat rudely) told that I had to wear a tie. They gave me an extra tie they happened to have around for this purpose. Anyway, so I'm sitting there and they start the pitch. Newcomers "you know who you are - you have the red nametags" had to go in a separate room for introductory training while the others were to stay in the main room for "advanced training." I felt like I had a lipstick V on my forehead.
So I go to the back room. Arielle pats me on the shoulder. "This place scares me!" We're sitting in the back room and hear this primal grunt from the main room. Gah! The guy gets up there and starts giving his sales pitch. It's interesting because I went more to learn about "how money works" than about "how to get rich through a business oportunity." Did I say interesting? I meant not boring. The guy goes on and on about how he's been with the company and how he has made X thousands, etc. All this is well and good, but I don't care. Then he goes on about "the company" this, "the company" that and says how great it is to work for them - the whole time talking fast and saying little. Except when he makes a point about the money you can make.
....
And then he pauses. And lets it sink in.
While he's talking about "the company" (he only mentioned its name once in passing at the beginning (for those playing along at home, it's World Financial Group), he also talks about "our CEO" rather anonymously, as well. Eventually he gets to the CEO's story. Hubert Humphrey. I knew I heard the name before. Turns out, it was the same name as a former presidential candidate and LBJ's VP. That's not the same guy. This Hubert Humphrey is the one who runs several multi-level marketing companies. As Amy Feldman writes in a decent article:
I realized I had walked into a pyramid-scheme-cum-cult and was amused. Here's the trick - I wanted to stand up and say "This is a pyramid scheme!" and walk out, but couldn't because I knew Shoshana's friend would get in trouble for bringing me. Instead I sat through the first presentation where there was more rhetoric than fact presented - Except facts about the guy in front of me who apparently closed on his third home and about "our CEO who has $900-something-million in assets. Hopefully next year we'll make him hit the billionaires list." (Why do you care if he's rich?) As the second speaker got up, he said, "I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so if you don't think this company can take you where you want to go, take a minute, excuse yourself and leave." So I left. Shoshana left, too, and one other guy who'd been talking on his cell phone through much of the presentation quietly in a language I didn't understand.
Then I went to Alan and Sherri's to watch Fraggle Rock. Moral of the story - Every Fraggle has a song. You just have to listen. And not waste your time going to free presentations on "how money works in this country, the Rule of 72 and so much".
So I go. (Oooh, I almost forgot to mention the best part - that we go to Vegetable Garden before. Mmmmm vegan Chinese.) I also invite my coworker and a friend of mine (they declined). I was told to dress in "business attire" which to me (nonprofit techie) means that I have to wear not jeans. Everyone was dressed in suit and tie. I was dressed in black slacks and a button-down shirt. My coworkers probably thought I was going for an interview. When I got there, I was (somewhat rudely) told that I had to wear a tie. They gave me an extra tie they happened to have around for this purpose. Anyway, so I'm sitting there and they start the pitch. Newcomers "you know who you are - you have the red nametags" had to go in a separate room for introductory training while the others were to stay in the main room for "advanced training." I felt like I had a lipstick V on my forehead.
So I go to the back room. Arielle pats me on the shoulder. "This place scares me!" We're sitting in the back room and hear this primal grunt from the main room. Gah! The guy gets up there and starts giving his sales pitch. It's interesting because I went more to learn about "how money works" than about "how to get rich through a business oportunity." Did I say interesting? I meant not boring. The guy goes on and on about how he's been with the company and how he has made X thousands, etc. All this is well and good, but I don't care. Then he goes on about "the company" this, "the company" that and says how great it is to work for them - the whole time talking fast and saying little. Except when he makes a point about the money you can make.
....
And then he pauses. And lets it sink in.
While he's talking about "the company" (he only mentioned its name once in passing at the beginning (for those playing along at home, it's World Financial Group), he also talks about "our CEO" rather anonymously, as well. Eventually he gets to the CEO's story. Hubert Humphrey. I knew I heard the name before. Turns out, it was the same name as a former presidential candidate and LBJ's VP. That's not the same guy. This Hubert Humphrey is the one who runs several multi-level marketing companies. As Amy Feldman writes in a decent article:
Hubert Humphrey wants to sell Middle America loads of gimmicky, high-cost investments through an army of part-time brokers. The scary part: It’s working.
I realized I had walked into a pyramid-scheme-cum-cult and was amused. Here's the trick - I wanted to stand up and say "This is a pyramid scheme!" and walk out, but couldn't because I knew Shoshana's friend would get in trouble for bringing me. Instead I sat through the first presentation where there was more rhetoric than fact presented - Except facts about the guy in front of me who apparently closed on his third home and about "our CEO who has $900-something-million in assets. Hopefully next year we'll make him hit the billionaires list." (Why do you care if he's rich?) As the second speaker got up, he said, "I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so if you don't think this company can take you where you want to go, take a minute, excuse yourself and leave." So I left. Shoshana left, too, and one other guy who'd been talking on his cell phone through much of the presentation quietly in a language I didn't understand.
Then I went to Alan and Sherri's to watch Fraggle Rock. Moral of the story - Every Fraggle has a song. You just have to listen. And not waste your time going to free presentations on "how money works in this country, the Rule of 72 and so much".
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