leftyjew | I like my women

Ok, people who read this but don't respond here unless drunk, here is your chance (Andrew, this means you). Also people who regularly respond here, this is for you, too. And everyone else, too, for that matter.

What is your favorite "I like my women/men like I like my...." (ILMW/MLILM) joke? Here are some to get you started:

ILMWLILM coffee - ground up and in the freezer
ILMWLILM scotch - 12 years old and mixed up with coke
ILMWLILM jeans - tied up with a belt and deep blue
ILMWLILM tacos - spicy with a little meat (see, they're not all disturbing)
ILMWLILM jokes - mysogynistic
ILMWLILM sheets - soft, clean and on my bed
ILMWLILM beds - warm, nice to lean on, and wearing a skirt

The list can go on, but I want YOUR jokes... so go!